Loving Yourself

What do you do when people say "love yourself"? What do you do when your emotions are not the same as those you see reflected in the faces of others? What if you are unsure of "love"?

When people say love yourself, it can mean anything from let go of the negative thoughts to buy yourself an extra outfit. Usually it is implying some sort of attitude.

But, if you are feeling numb, or if your feelings are not in line with the typical feelings experienced or valued by the society in which you live, trying to do something by feeling is difficult unto impossible.

Perhaps, instead of focusing on the feeling (this being said by someone who is a bit out of step with how the rest of the world seems to "feel") it might be easier to focus on the steps of wellness. 

Instead - try to make sure your body is fed in a way that nourishes it and follows its schedule (for example, I prefer not to eat breakfast in the morning, but to have a snack a couple hours after I wake up).

Try to make sure you rest your body often - in sleep and in moments of quiet where instead of doing you simply focus on being. Exercise to whatever degree you can.

Spend time feeding your mind. In whatever fashion fits the needs of your mind.

Feed your soul by taking in things of beauty - whether music, art, nature, people... whatever brings you solace and quiet. A source of strength that fills you. Religion works for some, but does not help others.

Look up the different domains of wellness (I like this model:  http://wellness-research.org/wellness/images/smallBlueIS-WEL_model.jpg)- and determine what items might feed you in each domain. Then - feelings aside, do those things. 

The feelings may never be there, or may never be like the ones you see in the posts and faces of people on facebook, the images on various media, or the feelings found in stories of friends. However, the care taken in growing your own self and your own body/soul/mind - that is what "loving" yourself is. It is nurturing yourself in all the ways you need.